My Way Or No Way. - Ugochi Oritsejolomisan
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My Way Or No Way.

My Way Or No Way.

My way or no wayThis thought and action is the culprit of the challenge or trouble many marriages face. When a husband or wife always insists on having his or her way there is bound to be trouble. Even if the other spouse takes it without a fight, it cannot last forever, there will for sure come a day or time when there will be resistance from the other spouse and the crack that has been created will be revealed.

Some married men and women push to have their ways without giving good thoughts about their spouses, what they think about it, and how the whole issue affects them. They rather focus on what they want, how they feel and the outcome they want to see.

The Strain.
This attitude puts a mighty strain on our marriages, when self is exalted above the other in a marriage, that union can never experience health or wholeness.
I have heard some couples say their spouses always want to have their ways and for peace sake they let them have it even when it makes them unhappy. You can imagine that there is little or no true joy in such marriage.

...Love (God’s love in us) does not insist on its own rights or its own way, for it is not self-seeking... 1 Corinthians 13:5(AMP) Click To Tweet

There is something stifling about this kind of attitude, it leaves little room for trust and openness in a relationship when one person feels he or she is being manipulated or forced into giving in to the other’s ideas, opinions, or ways too often.

It is a pride thing.
Some times we may be doing these things without realising it. We think our ideas are better, we know better or we are superior, so we push until it goes our way, and then if it does not go our way, we get angry, put up a silent treatment, throw a tantrum… I know you now how it is.

It is mostly pride (with it’s resultant foolishness) that makes one to insist in having his or her way. It is wisdom to let go sometimes and let our spouses breathe instead of suffocating them with doing it just how we want it, regardless of how it affects them.

Pride has nothing good to offer us, plus, it is destructive. Click To Tweet

If you think your idea is better, you must find a way to make your spouse understand it, while you try to see from his or her perspective on the issue as well.
Every one of us has to deal with pride and work hard on putting our flesh down so that God can be revealed more in our lives and attitude towards our spouses.

Let Us Die.
When we submit ourselves to dying daily, we will have no problems falling back and letting our spouses have their way, especially when it has no damning consequence, and does not affect our eternity. 
Love always prefers the other to self and considers the other first, especially in a marriage relationship.

Love one another with brotherly affection [as members of one family], giving precedence and showing honor to one another. Romans 12:10 (AMP)

Do you know if you are always bent on having your way?

Do you feel like your spouse is bent on having his/her way?

What do you think you can do to cause a change?

Copyright© Ugochi Oritsejolomisan 2015

Photo Credit: The Guardian

Sharing With: Wedded Wednesday

Ugochi Oritsejolomisan

Ugochi Oritsejolomisan is a mentor, encourager and influencer. She writes to inspire you to live a full life. Ugochi lives in Canada with her husband Benson and their children; Joshua, Joseph and Josiah.

  • Angel
    Posted at 22:02h, 19 January

    A “my way or no way” attitude will definitely destroy a marriage. Sometimes it develops as a result of a spouse not speaking up for him(her)self. In all relationships, especially marriage, we must remember that silence is agreement and submission doesn’t mean not having a voice.

    • Ugochi Jolomi
      Posted at 23:16h, 19 January

      I totally agree Angel, silence and bottling up does not make for a healthy marriage either.
      Many thanks, have a super blessed week.