Enslaved By Your Help
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Enslaved By Your Help

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Enslaved By Your Help

Amongst some other things I have passion for, I love to help others. I love to do anything I can to help another person, many times I have done so at my own inconvenience.
I also know several other people who would help some others whether or not it is convenient, people who would go all out and out of their ways to help others and put a smile on their faces. People who are passionate about others in need.
God has called us to help one another, He knows every man needs some man, He puts those in need in our way so we can help and also puts those who would help us in our path.

Our Expectations
There is the tendency for us to expect those whom we have helped to stay indebted to us. We expect them to treat or respond to us in a certain way because we rendered or are rendering help to them. When they do not respond to us the way we expect, when they do not help us in return, we get disappointed and angry.

Motive Check
When we do anything for anyone we should do it as unto The Lord without expecting that same person to favour us back, God can use anyone to help us if He needs to. That way we will not enslave the people we a have helped with our expectations of them.

The Control Desire
Some people also would want to control the recipients of their help. Just because they have assisted them, they want to run their lives and make them do exactly what they want them to do.

With No Strings Attached
We should help people sincerely without any string attached, out of genuine and selfless love not with hopes of what we want back from them.
Helping some one does not make us lord over them. We should help without trying to make them our slaves for life. Helping should be motivated by love and love does not control.

When we help in this way then we have done acceptable service unto God, we have done it to God, our reward is with Him, and He is a faithful rewarder.

And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me. Matthew 25:40

And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him. Colossians 3:17

So what do you say? Do you think we should enslave people just because we helped them?

Copyright© Ugochi Oritsejolomisan 2012

Photo Credit: bccns.com

Ugochi Oritsejolomisan

Ugochi Oritsejolomisan is a mentor, encourager and influencer. She writes to inspire you to live a full life. Ugochi lives in Canada with her husband Benson and their children; Joshua, Joseph and Josiah.

  • Howard Odigie
    Posted at 16:57h, 10 November

    What a frank piece. Of course this is exactly the way humans behave. I am sure this is ego-driven. We should learn what is right and expected of us by God from what have read and learnt here.

    • Ugochi Jolomi
      Posted at 14:11h, 11 November

      Ego always ends up in destruction, God help us all.

  • bECKA
    Posted at 10:26h, 10 November

    This is a great read. 🙂 I have someone in my life that we have went out of our way SEVERAL times to help out of love and family commitment. I never expected anything in return except that they try to help themselves and stop relying on our help so much. I don’t feel I could run their life but a little appreciation and understanding instead of the hateful words and demands we receive when we can’t give them what they ask for at the time they ask. It has gotten to the point where they expect us to help them before doing things for our own children and get angry when we don’t. So I think that some people can take advantage of a giving spirit and try to enslave them as well. And sometimes helping people can create a situation where they think they can control you and demand from you because they know you have responsibility to GOD to be giving and kind and to care for the needy. So I say help, give, and love but as the person above said, don’t enable someone that may need a good chastisement from the LORD for their own good.

    • Steph
      Posted at 16:37h, 10 November

      I heard a wonderful quote in a bible study this week: God commands us to give all the time, but not to everyone. (Do not cast your pearls before swine or they will eventually trample you)

      • Ugochi Jolomi
        Posted at 14:11h, 11 November

        Balance is needed dear Beth, I completely agree.

    • Ugochi Jolomi
      Posted at 14:10h, 11 November

      I agree with all you have said, I believe that discernment is needed and we shouldn’t enable sin or laziness.
      But we must help out of genuine love.
      Do have a super blessed day!

  • Lahyorz
    Posted at 14:53h, 10 November

    No, Ugochi, we should not enslave them. When we help others, we show them that they are valued and loved. That is something money cannot buy.

    • Ugochi Jolomi
      Posted at 14:10h, 11 November

      Very true my sister!
      Have a super blessed day!

  • Yolanda
    Posted at 00:24h, 10 November

    Excellent pose my sister. We should always check our motives and God’s counsel.

    • Ugochi Jolomi
      Posted at 14:08h, 11 November

      Thanks Yolanda! I appreciate your coming by, do have a super blessed day!

  • Steph
    Posted at 21:29h, 09 November

    Such wonderful points! I have a relative who I no longer accept any help from because she has some bad expectations afterwards.

    I also think we have to be careful not to help too much if a person is able and not willing to help themselves. My pastor said it this way: “Don’t be a gnat in God’s face and keep rescuing them from healthy consequences” The Bible says it this way: “A hot-tempered person must pay the penalty; rescue them, and you will have to do it again. – Proverbs 19:19”

    As with everything there is a balance: Help without expectations, but don’t ‘enable’ 😉 Love this post!

    • Ugochi Jolomi
      Posted at 14:07h, 11 November

      Of course, we cannot enable sin or laziness. Thanks a lot for coming by Steph, do have a super blessed day!

  • Esther Onimisi
    Posted at 16:19h, 09 November

    No ma. But we should enjoy helping people with no strings attached. It is the flesh that wants to control and enslave. And when we get that feeling in the flesh, we should cast it out In Jesus Name. Amen. It is a joy to help. Have a great day ma. Love you abundantly. And all yours.

    • Ugochi Jolomi
      Posted at 14:01h, 11 November

      You are right ma, real love does give help with joy and with no strings attached to it.
      Thanks for coming by ma.

  • Roxy
    Posted at 04:09h, 09 November

    Hello, This is really a very common problem in so many situations. One that I experienced was when I was younger, and someone would give me an item or furniture ect. And then it would have this little attached statement, let me know when you don’t want it any more, I might want it back (what) talking about strings attached.
    So I did learn early on to give and do with no strings or you owe me attitude.
    Blessings, Roxy

    • Ugochi Jolomi
      Posted at 13:58h, 11 November

      This a great stand point Roxy. Thanks for coming by and have a super blessed day!

  • ologundudu abraham
    Posted at 22:00h, 08 November

    The Scripture says “give and it shall be given unto you…”. Some people Actually abuse this by helping others just because they want something.

    As for me, With all sincerity, when i help people, I’m quick to forget why i did.

    • Ugochi Jolomi
      Posted at 13:57h, 11 November

      Great attitude bro!