8 Adultery Proof Strategies - Ugochi Oritsejolomisan
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8 Adultery Proof Strategies

8 Adultery Proof Strategies

Adultery has become unashamedly popular in recent times. It has risen through the rank and file of our society, young and old, low class, middle class and high class. The church and unchurched, believers and nonbelievers, leaders and followers, all classes of people have been hit and subdued by this destructive spirit of adultery.

Adultery does not do anyone any good, it leaves broken hearts, pain, guilt and many times wounded spirits. It is destroying marriages and building uncertainty in the hearts of our children.

ADULTERY IS SIN! We must fight it, refuse it, chase it away and kill it from our marriages.

About two weeks ago I wrote on 6 Ways You Can Avoid Fornication, you can read all about it HERE. On demand I had to sit with God to draw out these strategies against adultery. Some of the strategies I am about to list here would be very similar to the ones I listed two weeks ago because the fundamental principles work in both cases.
Note that this list of strategies is in no way exhaustive. Let me begin:

Until you agree with God that it is wrong for you to have sexual relations with another person’s spouse, you will not even consider avoiding it. God has commanded us that: “Thou shalt not commit adultery.” Exodus 20:14
So you must agree that God’s command demands obedience and commit yourself to it.

A heart that loves with the love of God at all times can scarcely fall for adultery. When you truly love your spouse the thought of not doing a thing that would hurt him or her would restrain you.
Either way, Christ’s love controls us 2 Corinthians 5:14

When you love your spouse you would refuse all temptations and desires because you care about him or her.

Love cares more for others than for self. I Corinthians 13:5 (The Message)

When you tell your heart the kind of thoughts to think, then when wrong thoughts come rushing in you would resist them and refuse them accommodation in your heart.
Watching erotic and too sensual movies do not help much in this regard because they play over and over in your mind and you begin to imagine what it would be like being part of the scene if it was real life. This could lead you to lustful and adulterous desires. What you listen to also matters; the eyes and ears naturally feed the heart and what your heart thinks on, your body will accomplish.
Lead your heart, guard your heart.

Guard your heart more than anything else, because the source of your life flows from it. Proverbs 4:23 (GW)

Even if you do not feel anything for an opposite sex, if you spend enough time with them you may lose your right sense of judgment, proximity can raise sexual attraction and it can be very subtle most of the times. Avoid spending time with any opposite by yourself. A lot of men have fallen for their secretaries, while I agree that when lust is in a man’s heart, whether or not he has a female secretary or assistant does not matter. I strongly agree that keeping a female assistant or secretary creates ample opportunities for the temptation and/or act itself. Do not think you are too strong, guard yourself…

There be three things which are too wonderful for me, yea, four which I know not: The way of an eagle in the air; the way of a serpent upon a rock; the way of a ship in the midst of the sea; and the way of a man with a maid. Proverbs 30:18-20 (KJV)

Tell your spouses of advances to you from another person, do not try to handle it alone. This will help him/her (Depending on his/her relationship with God) to pray for you, watch out for you and talk you out of even allowing such moves from the person.

Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour. For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow: Ecclesiastes 4: 9-10a

One thing that has helped me not to yield to many temptations is thinking of what pain it would cause me and how it could affect my eternal destination.
Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators,nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind. 1 Corinthians 6:9

There is immeasurable power in prayer. When you pray wisdom to handle adultery temptations is imparted to you. Prayer helps you to attack adultery and also defend yourself from it.

Watch and pray, that ye enter not into temptation. Matthew 26:41a

Like in the case of fornication and even other sins, do not stand and try to explain why you cannot do it. Do not try to sympathize with the person in question…

How would you deal with a temptation of adultery? Please scroll down to join in or start the conversation.

Copyright© Ugochi Oritsejolomisan 2013

Ugochi Oritsejolomisan

Ugochi Oritsejolomisan is a mentor, encourager and influencer. She writes to inspire you to live a full life. Ugochi lives in Canada with her husband Benson and their children; Joshua, Joseph and Josiah.

  • Pingback:10 Signs Of Looming Adultery
    Posted at 20:36h, 04 November

    […] to do with it, plus it has eternal consequences too. I shared some adultery proof strategies HERE to help couples avoid adultery but today I want to share in this post today, some signs for anyone […]

  • Megan
    Posted at 05:26h, 01 March

    GREAT post!!! more voices need to be heard about the dangers of adultery and that it should NOT be acceptable. Thank you so much for your courage to speak up. Loved it!

    And thank you so much for linking up with Marriage Week! 🙂

    • Ugochi
      Posted at 15:33h, 03 April

      Awwww… Sorry for this late response.
      Yes, adultery should not be acceptable at all!
      Thanks a lot Megan for coming by and sharing your thoughts!

  • Unyime-Ivy King
    Posted at 15:04h, 25 February

    Gbam!!! On point! So much have been written on this, but I love the way you outlined your points-very simple and straight forward. Accountability/prayer are of utmost importance in combating this menace that is destroying so many homes. God bless you sis.

    • Ugochi
      Posted at 09:53h, 02 March

      Thanks for coming by and being an encouragement.
      Do have a super blessed weekend!

  • Myne Whitman
    Posted at 18:57h, 13 February

    Very detailed and on point, any one can pick what works for them from here. Thanks for sharing

    • Ugochi
      Posted at 10:06h, 15 February

      Thanks a lot for coming by Myne, have a super blessed day!

  • kelekia1
    Posted at 07:40h, 13 February

    I followed you back and I am so blessed by your page!!! God bless you sister!!! I hope you have a Simply Heavenly week!!! :):)

    • Ugochi
      Posted at 13:45h, 13 February

      Thanks sister. I appreciate your coming by, do have a super blessed day!

  • Annmarie Cole
    Posted at 14:50h, 12 February

    Ugochi, this is a very serious issue especially in the church!!!! Being a single woman, the married men are disgusting! #8 is always my immediate reaction. But it gets tiresome and I truly, is very sick of it. I find my self on my knees more for these men and their families. But thank you for touching on this subject. God bless you!

    • Ugochi
      Posted at 13:43h, 13 February

      Sorry you have to face this Annmarie. But praying for them will help, if they let it.
      Thanks for coming by, do have a super blessed day!

  • MrsP
    Posted at 13:38h, 12 February

    I am so glad you have the courage to address this. And you are right on target. These work, they really do, but they are not easy. Avoiding adultery takes courage and a real desire to want to. The minute we start making excuses for our behavior, we’re sunk. Good for you.


    • Ugochi
      Posted at 12:02h, 13 February

      Truth Mrs P, Courage and determination goes along way to help.
      Thanks a lot for coming by and leaving this note.
      Have a super blessed day!

  • ebiichyke
    Posted at 11:40h, 12 February

    very well put.All around you, you find Adultery is something people believe you have to deal with at some point in your marriage but it doesnt have to be so.Loving your spouse is committment and it is unto God.Keeping guard is key. It doesnt happen suddenly so when you watch, you wont fall.Making yourself accountable to your spouse helps. No secret phone calls or movements that cant be disclosed.keep away from friends who advise otherwise.I was one of those who requested for this and i am glad its here. Thanks a lot

    • Ugochi
      Posted at 11:56h, 13 February

      Commitment and oath of no secrecy… I agree with you sis. Marriage cannot succeed without these two.
      Thanks for coming by, I am always excited to see you.
      Have a super blessed day!

  • Kathleen Caron
    Posted at 00:16h, 12 February

    Good stuff, I don’t know that I have ever been seriously tempted to adultery, but if you take your marriage and family seriously, you have to guard your heart. You cannot have the luxury of entertaining “what if?” thoughts. Ever.

    • Ugochi
      Posted at 10:54h, 12 February

      I agree with you Kathleen our thoughts must be pure so that our actions can follow.
      Thanks a lot for coming by and leaving this note.
      Do have a super blessed day!

  • Gail @ http://biblelovenotes.com
    Posted at 23:25h, 11 February

    Great topic and great points. I would add that if you or your spouse travel for your work, make sure you check in with each other via phone each evening when you’re apart.

    • Ugochi
      Posted at 10:48h, 12 February

      Very true Gail, we should always close the gap that distance tries to put us in.
      Thanks for coming by, I appreciate you.
      Have a super blessed day!

  • Anonymous
    Posted at 04:21h, 12 February

    Thanks ma for this proactive measures lisred above am so blest but I have a very good friemd she is.married.to.a barrister recently he called me to say his wife committed adultery with his very good friend. Infact he stop my friend from.going.to church etc .Pls ma what are the thimgs we need to do in this circumstance. What should be our reaction especially when the women is the culprit.. Elizabeth Law

    • Ugochi
      Posted at 11:02h, 12 February

      She must have let her guards down at some point.
      Is she remorseful? If she is you should talk to her, she should ask God for mercy and plead with her husband.
      It is not easy, but if truly repents and asks God for favour, she can win her husband back again. There is nothing too hard for God.

  • faithlovejoyhope
    Posted at 00:29h, 12 February

    Ugochi, thank you for another wonderful post that will hopefully impact all of us married couples.

    Blessings to you & yours!

    • Ugochi
      Posted at 10:55h, 12 February

      Amen Anna!
      Thanks for coming by.
      Have a super blessed day!

  • Beth
    Posted at 15:57h, 11 February

    These are all amazing and wise guidelines, Ugochi, but I especially like number 6. It’s one we often don’t think to do and can be very powerful in reining in our desires. Thanks for tackling such a sticky, but much-needed topic!

    • Ugochi
      Posted at 21:35h, 11 February

      In my mind, Number 6 comes amongst the first Beth, it does help me rein my desires.
      Thanks a lot for coming by again, do have a super blessed day!

  • Cindy Saul
    Posted at 15:52h, 11 February

    Ha!! I agree with Vicki, considering the world that we live in, this is more then necessary.

    I’m learned that the best way to keep with any kind of sin/temptation or it will eat you up. It’s important to tell something- accountability!

    • Ugochi
      Posted at 21:34h, 11 February

      I agree too Cindy! We must be accountable!
      Thanks a lot for coming by today, do have a super blessed day!

  • Vicki M. Taylor
    Posted at 13:29h, 11 February

    Excellent choice of topic considering the world we live in today, with disposable everything including marriage. Followed you from SITS.

    • Ugochi
      Posted at 14:04h, 11 February

      I am glad you think so Vicki, it is heart breaking to see many marriages going down.
      Thanks for coming by, do have a super blessed day!