YOU WILL GET IT TOO... - Ugochi Oritsejolomisan
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singles, love,


singles, love, …Sooner than later…

“I am engaged to marry a lady I love so much. But I have a problem with the way she treats people. She talks down on people and disrespects them. She even uses abusive words on them and I do not like this bit of her at all. The confusing thing is that she treats me like a king, always so gentle and nice to me,
She has never disrespected me once for these years that I have known her, but every other person I have encountered her with is looked down on by her. I have talked to her a lot about it but she doesn’t seem to see…”

Have you ever known someone who treats you so right but treats every other person like a joke? You have?  Me too!

I always advice that if you are in a relationship, any kind at all, with anyone and the person treats you with respect and dignity but treats every other person like they do not matter, take it from me, it won’t belong, you will get it too!
No matter how nice and respectfully you are treated, and no matter for how long, sooner than later you will get that treatment too. So you should talk about it and expect sincere and genuine changes. It does not make it good that you are respected when every other person is not. Every other person is a person too… just like you.
Listen to me, this is an attitude thing and it has formed part of who the person is. And who a person really is cannot be held back for too long. So don’t sit back unconcerned thinking it will be like that for always. Do not be fooled into thinking that it is okay to go on and marry a person since he/she treats you okay, even if everyone else is treated like dirt.
Why would you even want to marry someone who disrespects any one? And especially does not care about it?  I mean, would you not feel embarrassed? Would it not hurt you to see your spouse disrespect any person, even the lowest person there is?
Anyone who thinks they are better than everyone else has a major attitude problem, and even if you are the only one they treat right, it is still a problem because they will never be able to hold any relationship. If you do not work with them to deal with it before you tie the knots in marriage, then you are going to get it too.
If they won’t deal with and overcome that attitude, then the safest thing for you to do is like I always say…walk away…
Someone once said that marriage is very serious as it affects every part of someone’s life and so requires strategic praying and thinking. It must be thought through, and decided upon, weighing the consequences of every choice and decisions made.
Do not choose someone based on how they treat you alone, look at how they treat others too, it matters a lot more than you think, it could happen to you one day.
I believe I have said enough and I do hope you see what I mean; marriage is a very serious issue, so open your eyes wide before you walk in. Selah!
Proverbs 9:12 (KJV)
If thou be wise, thou shalt be wise for thyself: but if thou scornest, thou alone shalt bear it.
…now seriously, do you get me?!
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Ugochi Oritsejolomisan

Ugochi Oritsejolomisan is a mentor, encourager and influencer. She writes to inspire you to live a full life. Ugochi lives in Canada with her husband Benson and their children; Joshua, Joseph and Josiah.

  • Corinna @ The Sweet Spot Blog
    Posted at 01:46h, 27 December

    Hi there,
    Just stopping over from the Harvest of Friends blog hop! So glad I came across your blog. Now following you on Twitter! If you have a moment to follow back, you can find me at Thanks!
    Corinna from The Sweet Spot Blog

    • Ugochi
      Posted at 13:35h, 29 December

      Thanks a lot Corrina. Sorry for this late response, have a super blessed weekend!

  • Ibifiri Kamson
    Posted at 04:47h, 15 December

    I don’t think he should marry her. What good is it to treat every other person badly?

    • Ugochi
      Posted at 13:34h, 29 December

      No good whatsoever! Thanks for coming by and leaving this note. Sorry for this late response, have a super blessed weekend!

  • Bev
    Posted at 04:00h, 15 December

    hi, i’m following the “farmgirl friday blog hop” i would love for you to visit my blog and follow if you like it.

    new follower bev

    • Ugochi
      Posted at 13:33h, 29 December

      Thanks a lot Bev! Sorry for this late response, have a super blessed weekend!

  • A Proverbs 31 Wife
    Posted at 23:39h, 14 December

    Oh it is so true, over time, when the “love” wears off, you will be treated just like every one else, if not worse. Because eventually, those closest to you see the worst in you.

    • Ugochi
      Posted at 13:31h, 29 December

      Very on point truth my friend. Thanks for coming by and leaving this note. Sorry for this late response, have a super blessed weekend!

  • Lucy
    Posted at 20:34h, 14 December

    Oh, if only couples did a little more soul searching and I agree it is a huge red flag if the person is rude to everyone, it is only a matter of time.

    • Ugochi
      Posted at 13:30h, 29 December

      Soul searching will do a lot of help indeed Lucy. Thanks for coming by and leaving this note. Sorry for this late response, have a super blessed weekend!

  • Lame Shrill Owl
    Posted at 14:27h, 14 December

    I am following you from the Follow Who? Blog Hop. Please follow me back

    • Ugochi
      Posted at 13:28h, 29 December

      Thanks friend, can’t see where you follow though please give me a hint. Sorry for this late response, have a super blessed weekend!

  • Ikenna Nwosu
    Posted at 12:57h, 14 December

    Great and timely piece once again. God bless you mightily for putting this great effort in my generation and time. The Lord truly speaks and addresses issues. At a time when the rate of divorce is almost at ceiling level, the importance of a write like this cannot be over emphasized. Not a big deal? This is actually the big deal. Little foxes, little red flags that sets the undertone and baseline for marriages and often ignored by most young people. God help us. Amen.

    For me, it is even fishy being all nice and caring to someone and dishing all scorn to every other person. More of an act drawn out of motivation, perhaps in this case, to get married to “this” person. Maybe, even a dumb move as ordinarily, such uneven act should be obvious and easily discerned. But these “birds” are love struck and like it is said, although wrongful- Love is blind. Sincerely, for such strategic decisions like marriage, you really don’t want to go that road being blind. You seriously want to think and pray, sometimes, open-eyed. Yeah! It will surely come around. Sooner than later. For it is like the leopard’s spots, no amount of rain, make-up or clean suites can wash it off. It always does show up, most time when one is already dining and wining with it.

    As pointed out in the main article, it is an attitude problem that has to be addressed. You really want to take it headlong and talk about it. I like the objective communication option. Separating the issue from the person and constructively and jointly seek a solution to the problem. A supportive approach seasoned with love really helps because these folks really do need help. In this shoe and at this point, I will take the perspective of giving a hand to a fellow and not just as one I am in a relationship with. This is definitely more than “what is in it for me” or say- doing this because I am engaged to this fellow. The role of prayer and counseling is also key here.

    Nothing can take the place of experience and prayers do move mountain. Even this mountain!

    • Ugochi
      Posted at 13:26h, 29 December

      All true bro, thanks a lot for sharing your thoughts once again. Sorry for this late response, have a super blessed weekend!