I have had the privilege to interact with many singles on regular basis. I have seen that there are several questions they are looking for answers to, they have asked these questions during our general meetings or at personal encounters with them individually. I want to make an attempt to answer some of these questions from a Biblical view point hoping that my readers will find the answer they have been yearning for. These questions are not listed in any particular order, I am writing just as it comes to me and if I cannot finish today, I’ll do another part next week. Here goes:
1) If God Wants Me To Get Married
And the LORD God said, it is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. Genesis 2:18
And by implication; it is not good for a woman to be alone too. God created marriage for man and woman for the following reasons: companionship, procreation and help. So yes, God wants you to get married, if God said it was not good for Adam to be alone, then He desires and wants you married.
There is another side to this though, you can decide, by your own choice not to get married as a sacrifice to God. This is acceptable by God as long you truly stay celibate, free of every sexual immorality. But you must be really sure you are called to it, that you have the go ahead deep in your spirit.
1Corinthians 7:7, 9 (CEV)
7 I wish that all of you were like me, but God has given different gifts to each of us.
9 But if you don’t have enough self-control, then go ahead and get married. After all, it is better to marry than to burn with desire.
2) The Right Time For Me To Get Married
I believe that once you reach adulthood from age 21(it may differ for some people), you can start thinking of marriage. But then age is only a number and does in no way equal maturity, so this depends on some other things: emotional readiness, spiritual readiness, financial readiness…
You do not have to wait until you are 21 to start preparing for marriage, the earlier you start the better. And in case you are way over 21, it is not too late to start preparing right now, It is never too late for marriage; this has been proved time and time again.
Your preparedness is the key:
So Jotham became mighty, because he prepared his ways before the LORD his God.
3) How To Know The Right One
There may be so many ways to know but I would like to talk on a few I consider as basic.
The first thing I always say for a Christian would be, is the person a true follower of Christ, not just a professor but a follower. If the person is not of the faith it is headed for chaos, it is the fundamental determinant of a successful marriage.
Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? And what communion hath light with darkness?
The next thing you want to know is the person’s vision for life. If your visions cannot marry, if there is no common ground for your visions for life then there is a very likely chance that problems would arise, differences in visions and dreams can be a big issue.
Can two walk together, except they be agreed?
Another thing would be character: Anything you cannot take now, especially if the person does not think it is an issue, would pose problems for you later. Do not be blinded by your emotions please.
Better is the poor that walketh in his integrity, than he that is perverse in his lips, and is a fool.
Let me end with seeking God, this is the most important point, you must have a go ahead from God, even when everything looks alright. He only knows who is best for you and He only knows how to connect both of you. He must give His true peace about the relationship if you must marry that person; I truly consider this most important.
Thus saith the LORD, thy Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel; I am the LORD thy God which teacheth thee to profit, which leadeth thee by the way that thou shouldest go.
I wouldn’t want to make this any lengthier, Please consider these thoughts until next week when I will continue.
Have a great weekend!