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silhouette of couple dancing tango


I was waiting to pay my bills one day at the shops, the counter was a bit crowded that morning and I had to wait. I lifted my face to meet the eyes of a young man (good looking) as he winked at me. I looked away in a big hurry and wondered what he was thinking. Didn’t he see the ring on my finger? Was that a hello wink or was there something more? Well, I am a girl and I think I know the answer, but I tried not to jump to any conclusion, just to help my thoughts about him. When it got to my turn to pay, he stepped forward and offered to take the bill, he had a look on his face, I truly don’t know how to describe this look but it was quite unsettling. I refused of course, not wanting to receive this kind of favour from a stranger, especially this kind of stranger.
I have heard some people say they were just flirting around, no intentions of having an affair. They were happy that someone still found them attractive and was just trying to enjoy the moment. I believe this is wrong; call me narrow minded, old school or just too plain. But the truth remains that when a married man or woman decides to flirt with another person even for just a bit, he or she is treading on dangerous grounds. It is risky because if you are one who enjoys flirting, you will be opening up doors to infidelity, in fact, flirting is infidelity. You may not know it but flirting is a set up for adultery and unhealthy relationships. The other person might be very serious about his or her desires, while you think you are just flirting; he or she is already running wild in imaginations.
I have actually heard a woman say to her friend that she was only flirting, I found this disturbing because if a person enjoys flirting, there are chances that when the person he or she is flirting with brings on the pressure, it might be hard to resist, after all you enjoyed the attention you got and gave some green lights.
A man I met sometime and kept in contact with on the assumption that we understood each other, we were both married and our relationship was a pure one, based on our faith suddenly turned around and started some moves at me. I simply had to cut off, knowing that I would be treading on dangerous grounds; I didn’t want to give room for any illicit affair. Plus, I told my husband about him just to help me keep checked. It would be unwise to keep talking to this man and not keep my husband in the know of what was going on.
Marriage is a sacred union; it is a covenant of commitment, loyalty and fidelity. Flirting around with some person is a breach of you marital commitment and disloyalty to your spouse. The only person you are permitted to flirt with is your spouse, he or she is the best person to make all your flirtatious moves at.
Do not open doors to habits that can lead you into sin and destroy your marriage. Do not start what you might find difficult to stop; some people would pursue you till they reach your breaking point. So it is best to not even give it a thought, wink back, give or accept phone numbers. It is good to take your stand for fidelity to your spouse and say no to anything that could lead you to tamper with your marriage vows. Many people who committed adultery did not set out to commit adultery; it just took one step at a time. They refused to set boundaries in their relationships and one thing led to another…
When you flirt, you are dancing with the enemy, and nobody dances with the enemy without getting stung by his venom.
I wouldn’t flirt with someone just for the fun of it or for any reason at all, would you?
Ephesians 4:27
Neither give place to the devil.
Matthew 5:28
But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman or man to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart. (Emphasis Mine)
Ugochi Oritsejolomisan

Ugochi Oritsejolomisan is a mentor, encourager and influencer. She writes to inspire you to live a full life. Ugochi lives in Canada with her husband Benson and their children; Joshua, Joseph and Josiah.

  • Jillian @ Hi! It's Jilly
    Posted at 23:24h, 25 July

    I don’t think you are too old school at all! I think too many people are taking their marriage covenant lightly & leave themselves open to trouble. I, like A Proverbs 31 Wife, have my husband’s name on my Facebook and we have each other’s e-mail passwords & check each other’s frequently. (not because we don’t trust each other, but more, like, “Hey, honey, while you’re online can you look up such-and-such for me”) That can get tricky at Christmas time, though. Ha ha!

    • Ugochi
      Posted at 13:21h, 26 July

      Oh Jilly!
      It is sad how casual some take their marriage covenants. God help us all! Like you, my husband and I have each other’s usernames and passwords to everything. Thanks for coming by and leaving a note.
      Have a blessed day!

  • Andy David
    Posted at 22:39h, 24 July

    Wish someone would offer to pay my bills! No, seriously you did the right thing, trusted your gut instincts. Great post! Thanks for sharing.
    Visiting from Ropcorn’s Weekend Blog Hop.

    Thoughts Of Beauty In The Stillness Of Dawn…

    • Ugochi
      Posted at 13:37h, 25 July

      Thanks Andy,
      It is always good to make good judgements and right choices.
      Thanks for coming by and leaving a note.
      Have a blessed day!

  • A Proverbs 31 Wife
    Posted at 00:50h, 24 July

    Putting boundaries in place is huge. That’s why hubby’s name is on my Facebook account, and he has all my passwords.

    • Ugochi
      Posted at 14:43h, 24 July

      Great Kendra! We must “help” ourselves, we live in a “wonder filled world”

  • Eva Gallant
    Posted at 13:40h, 23 July

    I forgot to say I just stopped by from SITS to say hi and hope you’ll do the same.

    • Ugochi
      Posted at 14:10h, 23 July

      Ha ha ha Eva! I probably would have let him if I was sure no strings were attached. But I was so sure…
      Thanks for visiting, going over to see you now.
      Have a great week!