FOR HOW LONG?! - Ugochi Oritsejolomisan
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{Singles’ Tidbits}

I heard of a lady who returned from a wedding ceremony and couldn’t stop crying because she thought everything was just unfair.  She wondered why she was still not married and all the ladies she knew, some of who were much younger than she was, were all getting married and here she was, still waiting. It might not have made sense to her then if anyone had told her to wait. Maybe she would have just blurted out “For how long do I have to wait?!”

Waiting is something very difficult, most of the time. I have waited too maybe not for too long, but not for marriage, for a child. But it was one of the toughest times of my life; you can read a little about it here:  DANCING IN THE RAIN.  

So I can understand a little bit how it can be to wait for marriage. Especially when you feel time is running out on you and it doesn’t look like it is happening, when your friends, acquaintances or even siblings are all getting married, and you have to be in their weddings. This is not a very interesting experience, to say the least.

You feel like doing “something” to make it happen, maybe throw yourself at him, get her a bunch of roses or buy that expensive car to impress someone who might not even be looking. Desperation can really make people do foolish things and I quite understand the pain of what seems like an indefinite wait, remember, I have been there (in the waiting) and I did some pretty stupid things myself.

You know the truth? I find it difficult telling people, especially ladies to be patient for their marriage because a few I have talked with felt like I didn’t understand what they are going through, after all, I am married and I didn’t even have to wait at all. But you see, impatience has never profited any person.

Impatience will drive a person to make hasty and wrong decisions. Impatience will most likely cause blindness to the truth. Hasty decisions never produce positive results; impatience does not allow you think things through or view things from the right perspective. It can result to very severe consequences.

When Saul acted on his impatience, he lost everything. See 1 Samuel 13.

On the other hand, David always ran to God, knowing He alone could help him. See Psalm 121.  And we all know David was a successful King, with all his faults because he always ran to God. He is still being celebrated thousands of years after he has departed.

Desperation is not bad in itself; I believe desperation can produce positive or negative actions depending on what or whom it drives one to.

Matthew 11:28(BBE)

Come to me, all you who are troubled and weighted down with care, and I will give you rest.

The mind is at rest, when it ceases to be disturbed or agitated; this is the rest God promised. Not because the challenges are no longer there but in the midst of the challenges you will be at peace knowing that your time will come if you do not give up.

Let your desperation drive you to God, the source for all your needs, after all He is the creator of marriage, He said He would provide you a help meet, He said He would make you a help meet for someone. Trust Him and be at peace, I know it is easier said, but God has given you the grace. Your season is here; your change is coming, wait on God!


… all the days of my appointed time will I wait, till my change come.

Ugochi Oritsejolomisan

Ugochi Oritsejolomisan is a mentor, encourager and influencer. She writes to inspire you to live a full life. Ugochi lives in Canada with her husband Benson and their children; Joshua, Joseph and Josiah.

  • Cynthia
    Posted at 05:32h, 18 June

    I think that society puts a lot of pressure on people to be married or to couple. I have a lot of friends who are in situations they would rather not be in because they did not practice patience when it comes to finding a life partner. I feel that everything comes at the right time even when you don’t see the reason behind having to wait.

    • Ugochi
      Posted at 11:24h, 18 June

      It is unfortunate, I wish sisters will stand strong and not give in to such pressures while they wait for God’s very best
      I appreciate your coming by.

  • agman
    Posted at 13:00h, 17 June

    amen to that. go well

  • agman
    Posted at 11:25h, 17 June

    What a caring bit of advice, yes I agree that impatience can lead down the wrong path but we must not forget “Patience is a virtue”. so its a gift? to cultivate! I am what I am, and I have only that to offer

    • Ugochi
      Posted at 11:36h, 17 June

      Yes it is a virtue Agman, we can all cultivate it by the Holy Ghost.

  • SandyCarlson
    Posted at 01:41h, 17 June

    I think the best way to wait is like the lilies of the field. Take in the sunshine, bow with the breeze, and be It’s hard but it’s worth it. Life really can’t be force.

    • Ugochi
      Posted at 11:34h, 17 June

      Yes it is hard but worth it. Thanks for coming by Sandy. Have a great day!