A dear sister of mine who’s son is just about to turn one told me of how much she needs a job. Her husband seems not to want her to work outside the home even though he is not coming out straight. We had just finished a meeting in my office and another sister and I asked her to give it a thorough thought before she goes into something she might not be happy with in the long run, she told us some financial responsibilities staring her in the face and how she wouldn’t want to put too much pressures on her husband.
I told her I understood her very well, but insisted she think it through.
Working outside the home when our time gets out
of our control can place some limits on our motherhood if care is not taken, this does not in anyway mean that mothers who work outside the home are not effective, it all depends on the work hours, kind of work and most especially the state of the mother’s heart.
I HAVE SEEN MANY STAY AT HOME YET
I found myself telling her that she should ask herself what kind of mother she would love to be, one that cares too much, simply cares ,cares very little, or does not care at all. As I thought on what my next post would be, this conversation came to mind.
Now, the reason for this post is to cause us as mothers to evaluate our motherhood and help us make necessary adjustments in order to improve on our abilities regarding this divine call to take care of God’s precious gifts to us.
IT IS NOT TO JUDGE OR CONDEMN AT ALL, I AM STILL
A YOUNG MOM, SEEKING TO GET BETTER! 1. The Mom Who Cares Too Much
This Mom worries about everything.
Always agitated over her children, never at peace
Most times thinks evil will befall them
Restricts her children somewhat irrationally
Won’t let them “out”
Always expects more than too much from them
Forgets that they are “children”
Tries to be The Super Mom
She is always tired, stressed and irritable
2. The Mom Who Does Not Care At All
She wishes she was not a mom
Sees her chid (ren) as distractions
Lives like they are not there
Hardly speaks nice words to them
Looks for opportunities to be away from them
Does not have them in consideration as she plans her day
They probably spend all their time at Grandma’s
She disciplines without love
Or does not care to discipline at all
3. The Mom Who Cares Very Little
A mom only when convenient for her
If she has time, it’s okay
She will not go out of her way to make time for her children
She always looks for opportunities to “send them out”
Leaves everything about them to a secondary care giver (most times not daddy)
Finds it difficult to make sacrifices for her children
Always wants her “me” time even to their detriment
She disciplines “too much”
Thinks some mothers have nothing “better” to do
4. The Mom Who Simply Cares
She has a balanced approach to her motherly duties
Understands that her children are children
Loves her children enough to set healthy boundaries for them
Knows when to say no or yes to
Knows what to allow or disallow
Is not afraid to give her children age related,healthy liberty
Disciplines in love
Makes adequate time for her children
Is truly involved in their lives
Manages her emotions in raising them
She always commits them in the hands of The One who gave them
Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward.
There is no “perfect Mom”, this post is not designed to condemn but to bring hope that where ever you are, you can move to the next level, become a better mother.
They key thing is balance, my analysis may not be a perfectly cut one, but I believe it can serve as a guide to knowing where we are right now as mothers. There is no area of weakness that cannot be dealt with if we make up our minds.
MOTHERHOOD IS THE GREATEST RESPONSIBILITY
EVER PUT ON ANY WOMAN; OUR CHILDREN ARE THE
GREATEST LEGACY WE CAN LEAVE ON THE EARTH.
Most great people have referred to their moms as their inspirations, are we going to join in that league or leave our children to chance?
It is not impossible for all of us to be great mothers if we choose to, and work towards it. If you care too much you can choose to gain balance and not raise your children in fear, a mom that does not care at all can take baby steps to improve; if you care very little you can step up too, if you are one that cares, you can grow to care very much.
The best part is we are not left alone, we are promised divine help from the creator of children.
Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I amthy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee…
I KNOW THAT DEEP DOWN WE DESIRE THE BEST FOR
OUR CHILDREN, GOD CAN USE US IF WE LET HIM.
He will help us!