How Do You Influence Your Spouse?

How Do You Influence Your Spouse?

How do you influence your spouseOne of the things I am so very grateful to God about is His blessing me with a man who totally loves and fears Him, one who would choose to please Him above all in all of his dealings.
He always influences me to make the right choices and do the right things. Many times when he senses that I am about to go the wrong way or he sees that my emotions are beclouding my sense of right judgment he steps in and tries to redirect my focus, for this I am truly grateful. Though sometimes his methods are not exactly pleasing, I know that many times the flesh cannot handle faith except it be put down by the spirit.
I also believe that on more than one occasion God has helped me to help my husband do the right thing. You see, under normal circumstances, many times we are the Constant and best influence the Holy Ghost will find for use in the lives of our spouses… that is, if we let Him.

God expects couples to influence each other positively. He does not only expect us to model Christ to our spouses by our lifestyle, but to also influence them by words of advice, stirring them up to do the right things no matter the situation.

And let us consider and give attentive, continuous care to watching over one another, studying how we may stir up (stimulate and incite) to love and helpful deeds and noble activities. Hebrews 10:24 (AMP)

Truth however is, some people have stubborn spouses who would take no counsel from them, such people can be prayed for and brought under God’s influence.

We Are Influencers.
I find that some people knowingly or unknowingly influence their spouses negatively by their words and actions. Some urge their spouses on to “Give it back to them” when someone offends them, some instigate their spouses to lie or cheat in their work places; some give their spouses ill advice concerning a relationship…
This shouldn’t be.

We should, by the help of the Holy Spirit be sources of impact in the lives of our spouses such that because of us they become better than we met them. I have heard countless stories of how men and women have so influenced their spouses that they became great in their attitude, jobs, relationships and more. One reason God brings people together in marriage is to help each other become better.

Two are better than one, because they have a good [more satisfying] reward for their labour; for if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow. Ecclesiastes 4:9,10a (AMP)

We can positively influence our spouses in their-

Jobs – By encouraging them to put in their best.

Thoughts – By encouraging them to think positively about someone or an issue.

Attitude – By encouraging them to develop a healthy attitude to life.

Reactions – By encouraging them to act or react in the positive towards someone or something.

Lifestyle – By encouraging them to live a healthy spiritual, mental, emotional and physical lifestyle.

Relationship with people – By encouraging them to refuse unhealthy relationships and associations while encouraging them to walk in love towards everyone at all times.

Relationship with God – By encouraging them to pursue God with fervency, seeking Him in His Word and in prayer.

This puts a huge task on all of us since we cannot give what we do not have.
We have to strive daily to be positive people or we cannot possibly be positive influences to our spouses or anyone else. There are so many other ways to influence your spouse positively and so many areas your spouse may be needing you for influence.

What are the ways you are influencing your spouse, what are they ways your spouse is influencing you?

Copyright© Teshuva 2014

Update from 2013

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Ugochi Oritsejolomisan

Ugochi Oritsejolomisan

Ugochi Oritsejolomisan is a Christ-follower, wife to Benson, mother of 3 awesome boys, God's agent, speaker and blogger. Writing to inspire you for a better life in God! Find her on: google
Ugochi Oritsejolomisan

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4 Comments

  1. Thank you ma for this.
    I learnt a lot, as always, taking noted for the future.

    1. Amen! Thanks for coming by Frances!

  2. Sis, I think your husband is mine’s twin brother! And I cease not to give thanks to God for him. A man or woman who would rather obey and please God is the easiest for anyone to live with. Even if in heated moments you don’t see things the same way, when you chill and check with the Word,if you are of the same mind, you’ll find yourself on the same page. God’s word can’t be faulted in building Christian character. We run into error when we ignore or circumvent the Word and compromise. I always appreciate having a husband who feels responsible for me enough to gently steer me back on the right path. I pray to always be able to do the same for him. That is being our brother’s / sister’s keeper, watching each other’s back.

    1. My sister, I consider this the greatest gift anyone can ever desire. A spouse that fears God… it makes a lot of things easier to handle.

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