How Are You Influencing Your Spouse?
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How Are You Influencing Your Spouse?

two wedding rings nested in a soft pillow

How Are You Influencing Your Spouse?

One of the things I am so very grateful to God about is His blessing me with a man who totally loves and fears the Him, one who would choose to please Him above all in all his dealings.
He always influences me to make the right choices and do the right things. Many times when he senses that I am about to go the wrong way or he sees that my emotions are beclouding my sense of right judgment he steps in and tries to redirect my focus, for this I am truly grateful. Though sometimes his methods are not exactly pleasing, I know that many times the flesh cannot handle faith except it be put down by the spirit.
I also believe that on more than one occasion God has helped me to help my husband do the right thing. You see, under normal circumstances, many times we are the Constant and best influences the Holy Ghost will find for use in the lives of our spouses, if we let Him.

God expects couples to influence each other positively. He does not only expect us to model Christ to our spouses by our lifestyle, but to also influence them by words of advice, stirring them up to do the right things no matter the situation.

And let us consider and give attentive, continuous care to watching over one another, studying how we may stir up (stimulate and incite) to love and helpful deeds and noble activities Hebrews 10:24 (AMP)

Truth however, is some people have stubborn spouses who would take no counsel from them, such people can be prayed for and brought under God’s influence, even the hardest heart can be softened by one touch from God.

I find that some people knowingly or unknowingly influence their spouse negatively by their words and actions. Some urge their spouses on to “Give it back to them” when someone offends them, some instigate their spouses to lie or cheat in their work places, some give their spouses ill advice concerning a relationship…
This shouldn’t be.

We should by the help of the Holy Spirit be sources of impact in the lives of our spouses such that because of us they become better than we met them. I have heard countless stories of how men and women have so influenced their spouses that they became great in their attitude, jobs, relationships and more. One reason God brings people together in marriage is to help each other become better.

Two are better than one, because they have a good [more satisfying] reward for their labour; for if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow. Ecclesiastes 4:9,10a (AMP)

We can positively influence our spouses in their-

  • Jobs – By encouraging them to put in their best.
  • Thoughts – By encouraging them to think positively about some one or an issue.
  • Attitudes – By encouraging them to develop a healthy attitude to life.
  • Reactions – By encouraging them to act or react in the positive towards some one or something.
  • Lifestyle – By encouraging them to live a healthy spiritual, mental, emotional and physical lifestyle.
  • Relationship with people – By encouraging them to walk in love towards everyone at all times.
  • Relationship with God – By encouraging them to pursue God with fervency, seeking Him in His Word and in prayer.

This puts a huge task on all of us since we cannot give what we do not have. We have to strive daily to be positive people or we cannot possibly be positive influences to our spouses or any one else. There are so many other ways to influence your spouse positively and so many areas your spouse may be looking to you for influence.

What are the ways you are influencing your spouse, what are they ways your spouse is influencing you?

Copyright© Ugochi Oritsejolomisan 2013

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Ugochi Oritsejolomisan

Ugochi Oritsejolomisan is a mentor, encourager and influencer. She writes to inspire you to live a full life. Ugochi lives in Canada with her husband Benson and their children; Joshua, Joseph and Josiah.

  • Howard Odigie
    Posted at 22:09h, 27 November

    Great post. Very informative and educative.

  • Anna Popescu
    Posted at 16:19h, 27 November

    You are right on target with this one, Ugochi. I have seen it personally happen more than once. Thank you for sharing this truth with us!


    • Ugochi Jolomi
      Posted at 11:39h, 28 November

      Praise God Anna, I have seen it happen too, spouse influencing spouse.
      Thanks for coming by Anna, have a super blessed day!

  • Andrea
    Posted at 22:52h, 26 November

    Nice post! My husband and I can both be very stubborn and allow our feelings and pride get in the way of doing some of the things you mention in this post. It can be a struggle. Working on it…

    • Ugochi Jolomi
      Posted at 15:36h, 27 November

      I agree it can be a struggle but one that we all can win. We should be that influence…